I Think We Bought An Apple Tree
And other ways life surprises me
I love the face Greta makes any time I say, in a sneaky voice, “Guess what? I have a surprise for youuu!”
She blushes, her eyes light up, and she usually curls her fingers up by her mouth to hide her huge beautiful innocent wonderful three-year-old smile.
“What is it? What iiiissss it???”
Usually the surprise is some sort of treat or fun activity or friend we get to see that day, so she’s always ecstatic about it. It’s safe to say this pattern has taught her to love surprises.
I, on the other hand, have learned a different pattern as I experience more and more of life.
In short, becoming an adult has made me wary of surprises.
Because surprises as an adult often aren’t as fun as a random gift or your best friend coming over or your parents taking you to Disneyland.
It’s more like:
Your friend isn’t who they said they were
You wake up with a random backache
You don’t get the job you worked so hard for
You can’t find the perfect partner like everyone around you has
You have to spend tens of thousands of dollars on a new roof on your house
You disappoint someone you love
You have to work so much harder than you thought to get your degree
You get a flat tire
You actually haven’t healed from that thing you thought you got over years ago
Your basement floods
You can’t have kids according to the timeline you had in your head
Your friend breaks a promise
You haven’t been successful in your dreams
Your flight gets cancelled
You got married and aren’t living happily ever after
You trusted God and he didn’t come through In the way you were expecting
And on top of all of that, you learn Genovia is not a real place and no one is about to knock on your door to tell you’re really a princess (or a wizard, or a spy kid).
Real life is so hard. It’s easy to live in fear, constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop.
It’s easy to look forward into your future and picture nothing but disappointment.
It’s easy to lose hope and give up entirely.
Sometimes, I do.
But occasionally, usually when I’m least expecting it, life surprises me in a different way.
Like how we bought a house this winter and realized once spring came that the tree in the backyard is actually an apple tree (at least we’re pretty sure).
And tulips broke through the ground and bloomed around our front tree (even in the snow).
And the shorts I’ve been wanting to buy to fit my second-time postpartum body just went on sale.
And I saw a rainbow.
And a conversation I thought would be disappointing was actually really life-giving.
And the baby went down for bedtime last night without a fuss.
And we found a new breakfast place we love.
And my friend from high school told me that my newsletters encourage her.
And a Bible study I thought I’d hate has been my favorite part of the week for months.
And my daughter’s allergy test came back negative.
And my friend finally found a great guy.
And my mom stopped by with leftover food.
And my hair turned out great today.
And my daughter told me I’m the best mommy ever.
And no matter how much I doubt him and ask him questions and get confused, Jesus shows up for me.
And the right song came on at just the right time.
And I made a friend when I had none.
Life is hard.
But I think we bought an apple tree. And its blossoms were beautiful.
So I know good things are coming, too; I just need the eyes to see them.
How has life surprised you lately?🌸 Let me know in the comments!
Sarah
p.s., my first letter in a new series for paid subscribers comes out on Thursday.🤎 If you like my work and want to receive these extra weekly letters, consider becoming a paid subscriber. Each subscription, free or paid, means the world to me and gives me the means and motivation to keep going. Thank you.🤎